Well I haven't, but I have been watching a LOT of Youtube, so I do now. And when I say a lot, it's an understatement. It controls my life, and everything else is left to the wayside.
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| I'm not sure I have anything to add. It needs a period as its a factual statement. |
I've watching a lot of videos about finding sunken or lost treasure, and therefore for some reason a video about magnet fishing came up. Let me assure you, there are no diamonds or gold with magnet fishing (I'LL GET TO WHY SOON). I was bored so I just kept watching.
One video led to 20 more videos and my decision was made, a magnet fisher I was to become (that's Yoda ish. "Chosen my path had become. See or not see success happen it may become").
Now magnet fishing itself its not all about getting girls and rolling in shinny stuff.
You see its wet and slimy, and somewhat shi%ty. You will understand that part soon (just roll with it for now).
After watching various videos, finding knives (super old ones), fishing weights, fishing hooks, guns, cannonballs and random little pieces of metal, I was sunk into the idea ("sunk", you like that? Its a world play, which I like).
Magnet fishing is simple it only involved going through all the LIGHTNING deals on Amazon to find the right magnet (at a good cost). Once that's done, you are good to go.
I found one that claimed to lift 400 lbs. It also claimed it came with a rope and that its best for the dock, so you can bob it up and down. Ya, you don't flick this one out and hope for fish sort of thing, but instead you bob it straight up and down hoping to catch some nails or fish hooks.
The kids seemed extremely bored quickly. I thought, what a great dad I am to take them outside in the sun. Too bad I can't let them touch the magnet, touch the ocean water, touch the rope,or basically do anything on this adventure. They can always watch and that's half the fun.
My wife questioned me what's so great about magnet fishing again. I told her, you never know until you try. One fishing hook and you are rolling in the money. I just won't set my sights too high incase its only a penny or two instead though.
My chances of getting silver, gold or diamonds were dashed when I realized none of those are magnetic. So lots of coinage won't stick (I like pennies though since some stick and not heavy on pull up, helps my back issues). Mostly metals like nickel (so .25C coins and .05 C coins will stick).
After bobbing it up and down for 10 minutes I realized its not that fun, but if I threw it deeper maybe its more exciting.
Seemed like a great idea at the time.
I threw it with abandon while my wife and kids watched It flew like a discus in the Roman Olympics like it would fly all the way to Oylmpus! I thought to myself for what reason am I not an Olympian? Obviously I was born to throw magnets.
After a few seconds I saw the rope attached it it fly by me......oh no! I forgot to tie the rope end to well... anything!
I got down my stomach trying to reach the rope before it went under the surface. Unlucky for me, Canadian Geese had been all over the dock so their fecal matter was everywhere. Also, the water was brown, which according to the news was cause by not enough outflow into the ocean and the various boats flushing their sewage directly into the water. To top if off, an algae bloom was occurring (it grows more with the sewage from boats apparently). As the rope disappeared under the water's surface, it occurred to me, my dreams of catching "the big one" had been dashed. I had no chance of winning any magnet fishing derby's (if they even exist).
The tide was going up but I figured how deep could it be, this isn't the open ocean its sort of a small bay. Surely if Moses dropped by, he may part it for me. If not maybe it will go lower.
As we walked away from the wharf, I connected to the internet and ordered another replacement magnet from Amazon, lucky for me the lightning deal was still on. It had been a few days, so they must not be selling well (good for me but bad for that company and Amazon itself).
We got home and I shut down (I felt broken inside, my magnet alas, was gone). I decided with the utmost determination I needed to get that magnet and without my newer magnet I would need to wait 5 days for.
I started to prep. Testing what metal items were magnetic I had. I rounded up my dollar store fishing string (max line weight is 8 lbs). I checked my phone for the next low tide which was 5:54pm. Told my wife I needed to rush out, I finally found a hanger, a wrench, a crowbar, and a shovel. I wondered if I added some existing smaller magnets as well could I somehow make a super magnet, that even if not in the same area, would catch it and work with greater efficiency. I felt like a bit like Einstein (E= more than MC2, that is a joke in itself but only game nerds will get it, so roll with it).
I rushed to the kitchen telling my wife she needed to get out of the way, I have big plans and nothing will stop b
She probably thought I looked slightly unhinged. I started throwing things out of the pantry drawers. It donned on me that I could take a tin can (assuming its magnetizable) and put some magnets inside of it. Perhaps my dream of making a super magnet would come true. I looked around and we had no tin cans. I found the bigger can I could and drained all the spaghetti sauce. I didn't care about the contents, just that can.
After washing it out (necessary) I got out my magnets and tried to put them on the bottom. Issue is the magnets stuck to the sides of the can on the way down. I finally forced them to the bottom.. On top of that I took off the can top that I had previously removed and glued that on top of the magnets. That way it should spread the magnetic signal all throughout the tin can like a giant magnet (just FYI I don`t know if that`s true, I made it up, but its a theory, if Fox News repeats it, probably not true).
I put everything in my backpack the time HAD COME.
I threw in two super long selfie sticks, I figured if things go bad maybe I could use them.
The crow bar didn't fit. Disappointingly I took it out. I'll have to use that next time I thought, it probably weighs more than 8 lbs.
I ran down the ocean. There were some people on the dock (oh F!) I thought.
One guy stared at me, he had a camera in his hand. "OH another photographer", he said.
I explained I wasn't, he stated he had seen the tripod in my backpack. I told him its selfie sticks, a wrench, and a shovel to catch a magnet, he gave me a really weird look (wonder why?).
He said he was trying get a perfect picture of the ocean with the sun hitting the water. He needed the water still.
That wasn't going to work for me. I rushed over the rocky area and pulled out all my tools for the task at hand. I was a Sniper ready to lay down and prep for his target. A sailor out to sea for the last time. A gladiator in the arena fighting lions.
I grabbed all my stuff out of my backpack and realized, there was goose feces everywhere. As the warrior I am, I pretended not to see it, while I actually scoffed in horror. I attached 30 feet of fishing line to the shovel. Due to the weight of the fishing line being max 8 lbs, I decided I'd attach two lines of equal strength which is essence would make the line 16 lbs strength (I know that's not true now).
I took both the shovel and the tin can full of magnets and tied them together.
I looked around as a few people were wondering WTF am I doing. Even the guys on the basketball and tennis courts gave me a look. I look some pictures and a video before my Herculean throw, just incase it didn't work. All my fishing lines have become tangled in the rocks and seemed to now be around 5 feet long. I threw it like Zeus throws lighting and it went about 5 feet into the water. Due to the water being so dark (probably fecal contamination and algae bloom) I couldn't see the shovel. As I tried to pull it, it got stuck on the rocks. Somehow one of the carefully placed fishing string lines had snapped and I was now down to 1 line.
There was one one guy and a girl on the dock now. Looked like they were going on a date. I yelled over "Hey, uhh, I'm fishing for a magnet, weird question but if you see a red rope when you are out there can you pull it, its my magnet". The girl started laughing, the guy looked at me, obviously not happy I was ruining their date. He looked at me "You know the water is brown and there is an algae bloom right? Can't see anything".
I thanked him and asked he keep an eye out. I headed to the dock. I laid out my fishing lines very carefully in prep for my 2nd attempt, I threw the shovel around 30 feet, as a family above said he's fishing right? A little boy says "Yes, he's fishing". I wanted to yell up, ya I'm throwing metal things to catch a magnet. Wonder how confused they would be.
After a few tries, it appears both of my fishing strings that I had attached so securely had snapped. My shovel and more importantly my super magnet tin were lost to the high seas (but its low tide so just roll with it).
Next up was the hanger. The weight wasn't much but to its credit it was very magnetic. I figured it I added a hook it may catch the rope of my magnet and the world would be saved.
Each time I threw it, it didn't really sink. Since it wasn't heavy it barely went anywhere. On the third throw the fishing line snapped and it disappeared in the violent waves (it was calm but just roll with it).
At long last was my trusty wrench. I should say its my favourite wrench cause it is, and one of the only ones I own. Its not a cheap dollar store one, its an important one. I attached fishing strings to both pieces of it again, should one go wrong I had a fail safe.
I threw it like a fastball in professional baseball. You might call me the "Ichiro" of pitchers. As I threw it I remarked to myself how good a throw it was. Not too light like the hanger, and not too heavy like the super magnet and shovel tied together.
Just by chance I could feel a magnet pull. When I saw magnetic, it was like the fish that got away. It was perfect. It wasn't a rock. I could feel whatever it was dragging. I know it was magnetic because it was pulling with it. Resistance but not release. I worried the line would snap under the pressure. Somehow one of my life giving lines had snapped and I was down to the last part. Poseidon the KING of the Oceans must have pushed the wrench and it kept pulling till I felt the release and loss of the magnet I had under the sea.
I pulled up the wrench thinking I knew the approximate area, I threw it one last time as I knew the sun was about to set. I realized all the fishing line had snapped. I now had no metal items to throw except for my selfie sticks, which were too expensive to risk. Until another day I thought, as James Bond says DIE ANOTHER DAY, so I left it on, CATCH IT ANOTHER DAY.
I realized for the first time, the dock was absolutely covered in goose feces, I had been stepping in it, and my vast amount of fishing string was covered in it. I threw out the string.
As I walked home by moonlight (the sun hadn't set yet, but just roll with it). I thought about the good things this may cause. Its only temporary at the bottom of the sea, its more like a temporary storage spot.
I was going to the win the ultimate derby "LIFE" (just roll with it).
The tide was going up but I figured how deep could it be, this isn't the open ocean its sort of a small bay. Surely if Moses dropped by, he may part it for me. If not maybe it will go lower.
As we walked away from the wharf, I connected to the internet and ordered another replacement magnet from Amazon, lucky for me the lightning deal was still on. It had been a few days, so they must not be selling well (good for me but bad for that company and Amazon itself).
We got home and I shut down (I felt broken inside, my magnet alas, was gone). I decided with the utmost determination I needed to get that magnet and without my newer magnet I would need to wait 5 days for.
I started to prep. Testing what metal items were magnetic I had. I rounded up my dollar store fishing string (max line weight is 8 lbs). I checked my phone for the next low tide which was 5:54pm. Told my wife I needed to rush out, I finally found a hanger, a wrench, a crowbar, and a shovel. I wondered if I added some existing smaller magnets as well could I somehow make a super magnet, that even if not in the same area, would catch it and work with greater efficiency. I felt like a bit like Einstein (E= more than MC2, that is a joke in itself but only game nerds will get it, so roll with it).
I rushed to the kitchen telling my wife she needed to get out of the way, I have big plans and nothing will stop b
She probably thought I looked slightly unhinged. I started throwing things out of the pantry drawers. It donned on me that I could take a tin can (assuming its magnetizable) and put some magnets inside of it. Perhaps my dream of making a super magnet would come true. I looked around and we had no tin cans. I found the bigger can I could and drained all the spaghetti sauce. I didn't care about the contents, just that can.
After washing it out (necessary) I got out my magnets and tried to put them on the bottom. Issue is the magnets stuck to the sides of the can on the way down. I finally forced them to the bottom.. On top of that I took off the can top that I had previously removed and glued that on top of the magnets. That way it should spread the magnetic signal all throughout the tin can like a giant magnet (just FYI I don`t know if that`s true, I made it up, but its a theory, if Fox News repeats it, probably not true).
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| My magnetic tin can, aka a giant magnet "in theory", The plastic BOBA bolder was just to glue the magnets and hold it down from flying around. |
I put everything in my backpack the time HAD COME.
I threw in two super long selfie sticks, I figured if things go bad maybe I could use them.
The crow bar didn't fit. Disappointingly I took it out. I'll have to use that next time I thought, it probably weighs more than 8 lbs.
I ran down the ocean. There were some people on the dock (oh F!) I thought.
One guy stared at me, he had a camera in his hand. "OH another photographer", he said.
I explained I wasn't, he stated he had seen the tripod in my backpack. I told him its selfie sticks, a wrench, and a shovel to catch a magnet, he gave me a really weird look (wonder why?).
He said he was trying get a perfect picture of the ocean with the sun hitting the water. He needed the water still.
That wasn't going to work for me. I rushed over the rocky area and pulled out all my tools for the task at hand. I was a Sniper ready to lay down and prep for his target. A sailor out to sea for the last time. A gladiator in the arena fighting lions.
I grabbed all my stuff out of my backpack and realized, there was goose feces everywhere. As the warrior I am, I pretended not to see it, while I actually scoffed in horror. I attached 30 feet of fishing line to the shovel. Due to the weight of the fishing line being max 8 lbs, I decided I'd attach two lines of equal strength which is essence would make the line 16 lbs strength (I know that's not true now).
I took both the shovel and the tin can full of magnets and tied them together.
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| My dollar store shovel, dollar store gloves, super magnet and hanger below. These rocks were a nightmare and one might say my downfall (from grace, just roll with it). |
I looked around as a few people were wondering WTF am I doing. Even the guys on the basketball and tennis courts gave me a look. I look some pictures and a video before my Herculean throw, just incase it didn't work. All my fishing lines have become tangled in the rocks and seemed to now be around 5 feet long. I threw it like Zeus throws lighting and it went about 5 feet into the water. Due to the water being so dark (probably fecal contamination and algae bloom) I couldn't see the shovel. As I tried to pull it, it got stuck on the rocks. Somehow one of the carefully placed fishing string lines had snapped and I was now down to 1 line.
There was one one guy and a girl on the dock now. Looked like they were going on a date. I yelled over "Hey, uhh, I'm fishing for a magnet, weird question but if you see a red rope when you are out there can you pull it, its my magnet". The girl started laughing, the guy looked at me, obviously not happy I was ruining their date. He looked at me "You know the water is brown and there is an algae bloom right? Can't see anything".
I thanked him and asked he keep an eye out. I headed to the dock. I laid out my fishing lines very carefully in prep for my 2nd attempt, I threw the shovel around 30 feet, as a family above said he's fishing right? A little boy says "Yes, he's fishing". I wanted to yell up, ya I'm throwing metal things to catch a magnet. Wonder how confused they would be.
After a few tries, it appears both of my fishing strings that I had attached so securely had snapped. My shovel and more importantly my super magnet tin were lost to the high seas (but its low tide so just roll with it).
Next up was the hanger. The weight wasn't much but to its credit it was very magnetic. I figured it I added a hook it may catch the rope of my magnet and the world would be saved.
Each time I threw it, it didn't really sink. Since it wasn't heavy it barely went anywhere. On the third throw the fishing line snapped and it disappeared in the violent waves (it was calm but just roll with it).
At long last was my trusty wrench. I should say its my favourite wrench cause it is, and one of the only ones I own. Its not a cheap dollar store one, its an important one. I attached fishing strings to both pieces of it again, should one go wrong I had a fail safe.
I threw it like a fastball in professional baseball. You might call me the "Ichiro" of pitchers. As I threw it I remarked to myself how good a throw it was. Not too light like the hanger, and not too heavy like the super magnet and shovel tied together.
Just by chance I could feel a magnet pull. When I saw magnetic, it was like the fish that got away. It was perfect. It wasn't a rock. I could feel whatever it was dragging. I know it was magnetic because it was pulling with it. Resistance but not release. I worried the line would snap under the pressure. Somehow one of my life giving lines had snapped and I was down to the last part. Poseidon the KING of the Oceans must have pushed the wrench and it kept pulling till I felt the release and loss of the magnet I had under the sea.
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| A god this great, will help you, he can swim through water like a rocket (a Russian broken rocket from the cold war.... look just roll with it). |
I pulled up the wrench thinking I knew the approximate area, I threw it one last time as I knew the sun was about to set. I realized all the fishing line had snapped. I now had no metal items to throw except for my selfie sticks, which were too expensive to risk. Until another day I thought, as James Bond says DIE ANOTHER DAY, so I left it on, CATCH IT ANOTHER DAY.
I realized for the first time, the dock was absolutely covered in goose feces, I had been stepping in it, and my vast amount of fishing string was covered in it. I threw out the string.
As I walked home by moonlight (the sun hadn't set yet, but just roll with it). I thought about the good things this may cause. Its only temporary at the bottom of the sea, its more like a temporary storage spot.
I was going to the win the ultimate derby "LIFE" (just roll with it).
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| YA HE DOES (JUST ROLL WITH IT!) |
My Youtube Channel, wearing red tights and jumping around as Deadpool (but I say Dadpool to avoid copyright. Smarter than I look!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NwwCyK_ZPA
Other funny stories from this blog
My blog about everyday life (not Japan related/ and maybe less amusing )
My Youtube Channel (makes no sense just like my blog)
